Tag Archives: advice

Quick Question…

9 Mar

When it comes to personal blogs, how much is too much when it comes to sharing? Keeping in mind that the stuff you are about to offload online might just be seen by pretty much anyone with internet access and a love of reading.

P.S: I ask this because I can not afford a shrink and I feel like I am about to start posting some really personal stuff…Diary style.

Note to self #7

9 Mar

Do not fall in love if you are not willing to risk being hurt.

Being clingy will get you no where and in the end the only person you can trust completely is yourself.

Quote

I Quote a famous person #1

14 Feb

The moment you feel bored with life, slap yourself then focus on the moment. For each moment is as deep, mysterious, and wonderful as all the stars in the darkest night sky – P.M.Harrison

It’s Almost Valentine’s Day…Everybody Hide.

13 Feb

My dear and fellow earthlings, the dreaded “lovers day” is almost upon us.

freaking out

You know, when couples do romantic things for each other,things they have neglected from the start of the year and will obviously continue neglecting after the 14th.  Nothing like looking forward to getting flowers only once a year or hearing those three magic words that may or may not go AWOL again until the next February 14th.

I imagine it is an awesome experience I guess and this year I am spending my with one of the most amazing people I know..ME.  That is great because I am really looking forward to getting nothing.

How are you spending yours if I may ask?

I have some advice for those of you who are not looking forward to it. It might be that you are single or do not have enough money to spend or you just do not want because the idea of seeing red everything is making your head hurt. I have come up with a list, I hope it helps. Boycotting something has never been this fun. Please keep in mind that most of these are for the single people.

TOP TEN WAYS TO AVOID/ GET OUT OF CELEBRATING VALENTINE’S DAY

  1. The first one I am sure most people have tried it. Come up with a ridiculous argument, you do not even need to win just make it dramatic. When valentine’s day comes act like you are still upset. Spend the day in bed or doing all the things you love. If you are working, sorry. Make up on the 15th. Can anyone say make up sex 
  2. Do not under any circumstances watch TV or listen to the radio…the whole schedule is going to be full of valentine’s day shows. I kid you not, it doesn’t matter is it is Disney or HBO. If you have a PVR, start recording none valentine’s day shows now to watch tomorrow. Read a book, why not A Game Of Thrones??
  3. Pretend tomorrow is any other day or better pretend it is another of your favorite holidays. Put on a “likumbi lyamize” outfit or a halo-ween costume if you have to. It can even be Christmas, this is great if you have a Santa fetish, you can even put on the beard and everything. Just hope the red does not remind you of “the day which must not be named’
  4. As soon as you finish reading this point, set the date to February 15 even though it is the 13th. if you do not want to be extreme just do it for your phone and take down the calendars for a day. When you wake up tomorrow, it will obviously be the 16th (your phone says so).  celebration avoided.
  5. If someone asks you to spend the day with them, tell them that your neighbor’s best friend’s sister in-law’s cousin’s boyfriend’s cat died and you are attending the funeral. They will understand.
  6. Switch of your phone, the last thing you need are forwarded cheesy chain messages that will make you want to hurl.  If you have important phone calls that you can not miss, keep your phone on but please IGNORE ALL valentine’s day related texts or calls.
  7. Do your laundry, if everything is clean you can do anyone’s laundry that is in the house. Hey you know what they say “Cleanliness is next to Godliness”
  8. Facebook is a no-no for you. The last thing you need is all your friends in relationships rubbing it in your face about how amazing their day is, especially since you are avoiding it. If you love social networking so much, join good reads. You will not regret it.
  9. Have a zombie movie marathon, everything you can get your hands on. Resident Evil, Dawn of the dead, The devils rejects, Creation of the dead, A Zombie stole my lunch, Your money or your brains, Zombie Apocalypse  Run Run the zombies are coming, the works. (p.s some of these titles are totally made up)
  10. Start gardening. If you enjoy it so much continue with it even after the 14th.

Well there you have it, you can thank me later 🙂

xoxo

MY ALPHABET GUIDE – Positive and happy Living from A to Z.

2 Apr

Okay now before you even start thinking it, no I am not a guru, I am not a trained life coach or anything even close to that. I am not even a motivational speaker (though I wish I was). I am just a person, (up to now I still do not know if I should keep calling myself a girl or if it is young woman now, maybe its lady…i do not know). Anyway yes I am just a person that likes to think a lot, and during one of those thought trips, I ended up thinking about why I let the simplest of things get to me.

Recent events in my life have made me realise that it is not fair treating everybody badly because one person has offended me. I was also thinking that just because my life is not going exactly as I planned, that should not be reason for me to spend the whole day in bed in a sulky mood hating everyone and everything. Not saying anything to anyone and one bad word away from losing my mind and constantly on the verge of breaking down in tears.

Well suffice it to say, I decided I was not going to let the small things or even big things dictate my life and how much I enjoy it anymore. I was going to go after happiness and grab it by force if I have to.There is always something to be happy about no matter how shitty life seems.

With all that said, I thought I will use the alphabet to help me achieve this…those A to Z self help things always seem cool and I wanted one as well.
I hope by the end of It all I will be one happy and positive person. If you want you can adopt it too.

A.
-ALWAYS look to God no matter how simple or complicated life is. Prayer and having faith in Him always gives a feeling of hope and happiness.

B.
-BREAK FREE of relationships that never bring you happiness.

C.
-CREATE friendships with people that understand you and make you smile.

D.
-DON’T let one bad experience prevent you from getting back on your feet and living a happy life.

E.

-ENJOY each day like it is your last but do not get reckless and end up in hospital or the grave yard.

F.

-FORGET the past, looking back at what once was will just get in the way of you appreciating what you have now.

G.

-GREET each hurdle that comes your way as a way of making you stronger.

H.

-HAVING difficulty letting go of something that should be forgotten is not going to make you happy. If something hurt you, for not more than a day, “cry yourself a river, build a bridge and GET OVER IT”. thinking about it all the time isnt really helping anyone.

I.

-INVEST your time in doing things that make you happy. Go out, take up sports, start cooking, do anything as long as at the end of the day, you will be with a smile on your face.

J.

-JOKE, JOKE, JOKE, Joking always makes everybody laugh and helps you forget about the things getting you down.

K.

– KEEP the people you care about and who care about you close.

L.

-LET GO of grudges. being bitter about things long gone is only going to hurt one person..YOU.

M.

-MIND the people you let into your life. Some people bring nothing but pain and sadness with them.

N.

-NEVER let anyone dictate  your life and and tell you that you are not worth anything.

O.

-OPTING TO smile and believing that you are incharge of your own happiness is probably the best decision you will make.

P.

-PUTTING your happiness in someone else’s hands is never a good idea, sooner or later they might ‘lose’ it.

Q.

-QUITTING on life when it gets hard is never the answer. Pick yourself up and find a reason to live.

R.

-REMIND yourself that you are an amazing person worthy of being happy no matter what people tell you.

S.

-SEARCH for a reason to smile whenever things do not work out for you. If you can not find anything, touch your chest and feel the beat of your heart, there is a reason you are alive. This is just a minor set back.

T.

-TRYING to compare your life and who you are to someone else will only bring you sadness. You are who you are..UNIQUE, and people love you for that. Do not wish you were living someone else’s life.

U.

-UNDERSTANDING that it is impossible for everyone to like you and what you do and knowing that some people are naturally ‘haters’, who will never appreciate a good thing, will help you to avoid situations where you stop living your life because you are worried what people will think. Don’t let what people say control how you live your life, because in the end only one person will not be happy, and that person is you.

V.

-VALUE the things that you have been blessed with. You just never know how much less some people have.

W.

-WHAT you ask for is exactly WHAT you get. If you order a cheese burger in a food joint, you will be given a cheese burger, hence in life if you adopt Positive thinking, positive things will happen to you. Be positive.

X.

-‘XPECT and believe that even when reach your lowest point in life, it always gets better. It is just a passsing phase and you will rise again. (okay, I couldnt think of a word which starts with an X okay, I winged it)

Y.

-“YESTERDAY is history, Tomorrow a mystery, Today is a gift, That’s why it is called the present” So Be happy in the time that you are sure you have. Life is too short to spend being filled with negativity and a bad mood.

Z.

-ZAP yourself back to reality whenever you stray off day dreaming for too long. Even when life gets unbearable, try to find you way back to reality. Like Albus Dumbledore said – “it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live”

 

After coming up with all these, I now have them stuck in my head, I hope It helps because I am really tired of all the depressing days feeling sorry for myself and ruining the mood around the house. And if you are reading this and you feel like maybe you let people or other things get you down easily alot of times, I do hope this helps and that you will try to live a happier and positive life.

A fine line between sweet and sour-Women

22 Mar

They say a happy woman makes a happy home…simple and straight forward.
Forget all this talk of women are complicated, they are from pluto or only aliens know the secret to pleasing them. It is all bogus and just an excuse to make us seem like we are confused retards who have an average of ten mood changes per day. Get to know us and just try to understand. No two ways about it 🙂 .
So often we hear guys saying how they have had it with women and how they never really know what to say to avoid ‘the silent treatment’ and possible arguments.

It is simple we act according to how we are treated. Say nice things and treat us like queens and you will be rewarded like wise-THE SWEET TREATMENT…but disrespect us and treat us like you do not appreciate us and well we will pretty much bite your head off and make your life a living hell-THE SOUR TREATMENT.
One thing i have realised about being female is that we can not live without compliments…laugh if you want but its true. It is almost like compliment are to women like water to a plant (well not that much) but its close. If we were not complimented enough we would just wilt away and die…a really slow and painful death. It aint even a joke *straight face*

But of course i am not talking about those lame pick up lines that make us want to hurl, laugh out loud and wonder which comedy show you star in or maybe even poke out our own eyes…I mean real stuff. Believable stuff that can make us smile.
If a girl is from the salon and just did her hair, being told that ‘you look amazing’ is just what she wants to hear. It doesnt hurt at all to say nice things, especially if she did go the extra mile to look good.
I often do not like accepting this truth but whenever i do my hair or put on a new amazing outfit and i want my boyfriend to see it and he does not say anything…well i hurt inside and even though i know i look pretty in it, not hearing him say so makes me doubt it a bit…but of course i never show it. 🙂 its true.
I guess in the ended all that women want is to feel needed and appreciated 🙂

My simple guide to gaining 2000 facebook friends in a week

3 Mar

Hello there!

Do you think what that man is doing is “facebooking”?

Are you sad and lonely?

Do you feel unappreciated because you have less than 200 facebook friends?

are you bullied daily because you are still in the 3 digit numbers?

would you like to be a facebook celebrity?

Not to worry because your wish is about to come true…after years of daily facebooking and fighting the addiction (well i am still an addict), I am pleased to say that I have found the well hidden secret to having 4000+ contacts when you are not a celebrity. It took a while to sink in but when it finally did, boy was i glad.

Before I even start my simple guide, you must first promise yourself that no matter how absurd the advice sounds, it has worked for some people and you should commit yourself completely to it.

TOP TEN STEPS TO BECOMING A FACEBOOK CELEBRITY:

.

Step 1: Come up with a catchy ridiculously long name that discribes who you are and include a celebrity name and Tv character in it e.g Dorcas IamTallAndCreepyWithlongLegs carter salvatore amis. 😀

Step 2: Have a bad girl attitude and dont take shit from anyone… update your info with things like you are the manage of a company called “keeping it sexy corp” and that you went to high school at a school called “too hot to handle me high”. 😀 (always invites people in)

Step 3: Upload half naked pictures of yourself, make sure they are hot, otherwise it wont work. (use your body to get attention) 😀

Step 4: Choose a sexy Profile picture-one where you are in your bra, kneeling on your bed, one hand on your waist and licking a lolipop (black and white works best, i know this because I am a culprit..*.the black and white part not the bra part*) 😀

Step 5: Update really eye catching updates that will have all the guys and girls thinking “OMG” especially about sex and dirty jokes (speaking from experience..)

Step 6: Talk about the parties you attend and upload pictures to prove how blazing it was and how sexy you looked.. (do a peace sign in all your pictures)

Step 7: If you are a girl make sure you have a lot if pictures showing off you cleavege (lean forward so people can see them better..they loooove boobs on facebook)

Step 8: when it is after 10pm post updates like “i am so horny and lonely, wanna chat in my inbox” or “it is freezing, i wish i had someone to keep me warm”

Step 9: Complain about the “haters” you have and insult them, telling them how they remind you of dog shit. this will have people thinking, “damn, this person is hard..let me suggest them to my friends” (mission impossibe)

Step 10: Befriend all the well known people and add them to you relatives list e.g  having a lot of cousins, fathers, mothers, daughters, grandfathers in your info. They should also have long name and cool profile pictures.

well thats about it, if that doesnt work i dont know what will. 😀 😀 😀

18 crazy relationship Do’s and don’t’s

2 Mar

Okay when it comes down to relationships, especially new ones, in my experience it can be a little awkward. with the period where neither one of you knows what is really going on. And the dreaded “talk” when you have to define just what you are to each other. It can also be going out in public together for the first time as a Couple. All this stuff is just crazy.

I have been in my fair share of relationships and I can honestly say I am “wack” at this. Its like I am the definition of ‘the worst girlfriend in the world’. Its either I am saying the wrong things, doing the wrong things, feeling the wrong things and maybe even wearing the wrong things.

So my conclussion is that maybe if you avoid all the things that I did, what other people did and what I read about, maybe, just maybe we can come up with a relationship that will not fall to pieces.

These might come out as a little crazy but they just might work.

.

  • Do not have jealous bones in your bodies-these bones bring nothing but unnecessary pain and noisy fights in public. Not to mention people calling you a psycho.
  • Do not insist on meeting his parents 2 weeeks after you are official- This is just wrong and crazy, you are moving too fast..chill
  • Do talk about your problems when they arise, but do it calmly-bottling things up will just make you sick and fat. Imagine not going to the toilet fo a month.
  • Do compliment each other every once in a while- it doesnt hurt to tell her she looks good when she does and vice versa
  • Do not talk about you period every time and how EXPLOSIVE your diarrhea was- I have a feeling that guys dont like hearing how “the downstairs” is suffering and the bad toilet experience, especially during dinner.
  • Do make sure you remember things like birthdays and anniversaries…if its valentine’s day dont even act dumb about it-unless you want it to be put in record. such things are never forgotten..NEVER.
  • Do not make jokes about how fat one of you is getting and how they look like an obese baby hippo.
  • Do act spontanous and give them a sexy massage just for fun-but only if you know what you are doing, it would be embarassing if you ended up sending them to the emergency room.
  • Do not talk about marriage after a month and things like how many babies you want to have-that stuff scares off people more that freddy on friday the 13th
  • Do tell her just how much she means to you and send random texts saying that you miss her- its surprising how that little text can make her day, girls are so weird.
  • Do Get involved in what the other person likes- there is nothing worse than people who have nothing in common not finding common ground. Then you end up having conversations about the weather all the time and asking things like “sooooo, what do you think about the sky today..pretty blue,huh?” (lame)
  • Do shave once in a while or Do not shave, depends on the person i guess- one mans disgusting leg hair that makes big foot look like a new born baby rat is another mans turn on. (weird)
  • Do not fake your death and leave a fake $1,000,000 share in you fake will, as an April fool’s day prank- that is just insensitive(though its kind of genius)
  • Do not go obsessed on them and call, text, tweet, update about them, inbox, whatsapp, poke, send a letter, post on their wall or sing songs for them all at the same time every one hour. Writting things like “you are the air that i breath and if i lost you i will stab out mu heart” will not gain you any good point. (not that i did that because that is just crazy :D)
  • Do not eat like a pig in front of them and talk with your mouth full of food as you dance to the macarena on the kitchen table- i dont know why anyone would do that but, yeah DO NOT DO THAT.
  • Do not talk about serious relationship things in texts and have arguments online. writting in capital letters to show that you are upset and sending a text of an emoticon that is upset or one that is crying is just weird even in this texting generation. Talk face to face and work it out…it will even be better when you make up because the make up sex will be awesome, make up phone sex is just creepy.
  • Do give each other breathing space, spend time with him, your friends and your family-seeing each other 24/7 will just sicken you. too much of anything is bad
  • Do not take naked pictures of them and post them online, Do not even set up a hidden camera to record as you get intimate them show it to your friends-unless you want to be famous and be featured in  the newspaper or talked about by everyone online.(which is amazing by the way..quick fame) DONT DO THIS.
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