WHAT YOU MAY NOT KNOW ABOUT GAINING BLOG FOLLOWERS.

26 Mar

THIS IS MY SIMPLE BLOG CYCLE FROM THE DAY YOU FIRST DISCOVER BLOGGING TO THE DAY IT EVENTUALLY KILLS YOU.

So you have always been a reader, ever since you discovered the deeply hidden pleasure that words bring you, secretly placed between the sacred pages we call books and before you knew it, you were a full blown book junkie. Reading every where and anywhere. If you see writings, you eyes just have to focus on that until you have read it all.

While eating breakfast, your eyes firmly fixed on the cereal box…because somehow it has become interesting.

A time comes when you start going through you “journal phase” and writing in diaries. Not so long after that you are convinced you can be a writer. I mean just look at the awesomeness of the stuff you write.

You flood people’s walls on facebook with you notes and every plain paper in the house has your writings on them. Random stuff that just pops out of your over active brain. What harm is writing going to do to you right?

Then one day someone comes out and tells you…”you know something, you have the makings of a writer..You should start writing for a magazine or something.” But you just say thanks and continue writing those notes.

Watching Television, all you here is people talking about blogs and blogs and blogs and even more blogs. Then like Chris Brown it suddenly hits you. BANG. Straight in the face. Well its more subtle than the way I have put it, but you get the point. MY OWN WEBLOG, NOW WHY DIDNT I THINK OF THAT??

And then it starts, the begining of the end. Your slow demise….( there is so much exaggeration in this statement but try not to read into it too much)

The phases you will go through until you are no more: (more exaggeration)

PHASE 1: The “I am new here and dont really know what I am doing” Phase

1.  you write your first blog entry and feel good about it…after all it is just for fun. It is not like your are going to be the next Perez Hilton or something like that. Though secretly you wish you were.

2. you tell you friends about it and give them a link to it. I mean come on you are excited, who wouldnt share this?

3. you get good feedback from your friends..this is amazing you think to yourself. You feel like you are the queen of the world or something, or atleast queen of blogging. So you post some more stuff.

4. Then you get comments and compliments from other bloggers about how amazing your blog is. (good feeling right there)

PHASE 2: The ‘I am now a real Blogger” Phase

1. The stats show how you have grown as a blogger and how many people  visit your blog.

2. This makes you feel like you have achieved something awesome. A feeling that only a fellow blogger can understand. Its like when you cook something delicious and people want more…if you are a crappy cook, let me tell you, the feeling is AMAZING.

PHASE 3: The “OMG, 8 followers” phase.

1. you suddenly realise that you have gained a decent number of followers. When did that happen?

2. This is good.

3. all you see now are butterflies and rainbows…if you hate that, imagine whatever you like. But bottom line is you see things.

PHASE 4: The “OMG, 30 followers expecting me to blog about good things” phase

1. then it hits you, dear Lord… How do I prevent myself from disappointing all these people?

2. what if I write Crap and they all laugh at me?

3. What happens when Ellen Degeneres Makes a show about “the worlds worst blogs” and i am number 1?

4. Dear me, what have I done?

PHASE 5: The “coming up with the best topics to wow your followers” phase

1. Back to the “drawing board” or whatever phrase people use when you have to go back to square one and come up with good ideas and stuff.

2.You realise your life isnt really that interesting these days and a voice in your head goes “we are so screwed”.

3. come to me blogging ideas..PLEASE.

PHASE 6: The “Stressing It to the point that you even start to look ugly” phase.

1. what to do?  what to do?

2. Screaming out loud becomes a norm and people start to worry about you?

3. you are always stressed and uneasy.

PHASE 7: The “sleepness nights, until Insomnia becomes your middle name” phase.

1. no more sleep, sleepless nights writing and coming up with new ways to shine. This is too much for you to take.

2. you feel like you have become a slave to the system.

3. You have become a monster.

4. Coffee is now your best friend.

PHASE 8: The “I have Found what to blog about and feel good about myself” phase

1. you feel you have cracked the secret to perfect blogging again.

2. The new blog posts are a bit ‘special’ if you can say that.

3. Not really sure what people will think and part of you wishes they will be kind to you and not murder you with words.

PHASE 9: The” I feel crazy in a Blogger kind of way and without blogging I will die” phase.

1. you are a crazy person now. You are not sure if blogging has anything to do with it. All you know is that, you now just write about anything and everything. And Though you used to have humour in your posts, these days you post make people shit their pants with laughter.

2. you are a blogging lunatic and a wordpress addict.

3. the hits on your blog have now become your life force.

4. you think and therefore you blog.

Okay maybe I have just over analysed everything and Blogging doesnt kill anyone. Who Knows? All I know is as soon as i got my first 6 followers, I felt a new sense of responsibility. Like I was a super hero or something. I had to delivver. Can you imagine superman slacking on his superman duties. He owes it to the people to put on his underwear over his tights (no matter how weird and funny it might look) and save them.

So from one ‘super hero’ to another, let us all go crazy and blog. Even If ‘kills’ us 😀 .

And to the people following my blog, please do not unfollow me because you are good samaritans trying to help me out. Do not even think about it 😀

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21 Responses to “WHAT YOU MAY NOT KNOW ABOUT GAINING BLOG FOLLOWERS.”

  1. Mia March 26, 2012 at 7:13 pm #

    haha i love it!

  2. pattyamis March 26, 2012 at 7:29 pm #

    lol..blogging lunatic..I like tht

  3. Aina Balagtas March 27, 2012 at 1:49 am #

    I love it!

  4. Sui Generis March 27, 2012 at 10:04 am #

    lol great stuff!

    • A Girl Nicknamed Dee March 27, 2012 at 10:19 am #

      Thanks mate, coming from you that means a lot 🙂

      • Sui Generis March 27, 2012 at 10:23 am #

        You welcome.

  5. MissLallita March 27, 2012 at 2:50 pm #

    loved this post, #GoodReading xx

  6. sylvester March 27, 2012 at 6:40 pm #

    i like the pictures besides the writing, it makes it more interesting & funny……..great stuff

    • A Girl Nicknamed Dee March 28, 2012 at 12:41 am #

      Like they say ‘a picture says a thousand words’ haha. I am glad you enjoyed the post 🙂

  7. mamacheri March 28, 2012 at 1:22 pm #

    excellent!

  8. sarsm March 28, 2012 at 3:36 pm #

    I would say that’s pretty spot on!

  9. Natalie March 28, 2012 at 4:31 pm #

    Oh my this made me laugh! I’m currently in the early stages of the cycle- lets hope it stays that way and I don’t crack up!

    • A Girl Nicknamed Dee March 28, 2012 at 8:01 pm #

      Hahaha, lucky for you…though i can not promise that you will not end up at phase 9 😀

  10. Brown Vixxxen March 31, 2012 at 5:00 pm #

    haha oh dear…i’m on phase two…good one..x

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